SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 48

Once upon a time! 
When Window was just a square hole in a room & Application was something written on a paper. When Keyboard was a Piano and Mouse just an animal. When File was an important office material and Hard Drive just an uncomfortable road trip. When Cut was done with knife and Paste with glue. When Web was a spider's home and virus was flu. When Apple and Blackberry were just fruits..
That's when we had a lot of time for family and friends!😊

**********
A guy underwent rituals and dipped in water 3 times.
After the third dip, the Priest said: "You are now undergone rituals, you are a new creation. The old one is gone, no more drinking of alcohol for you."
The guy went back home and headed straight for the fridge. He took a Kingfisher Beer, dipped it in water 3 times and said: "You are now a new creation, the old one is gone. Your new name is Green Tea!" 😂😆

**********
Men will be men ...
Killer Joke:
Foreigner - which is the most famous adventure sport in India?
Indian - Arranged Marriage 😂😆😆

**********

Roger Federer become father to a second set of twins 😱
First twin girls were born five years back 👭
Now twin boys 👬
Now he has a family who can play all types of tennis:
Mens singles
Women singles
Mens doubles
Womens doubles and 
Mixed doubles...😄🎾👍

This is called 
Grand Slam Planning
😀😜😀😝😄😛

**********
I love this msg, its toooo goood, 

* Worries at the start of the day means u r still alive... 
* Clothes that don't fit means u have a good appetite... 
* Tears in ur eyes means there is somebody u care for... 
* The mess to clean after party means u have friends around u... 
* Roof that needs fixing means u have got a house... 
* Taxes to pay means u r not unemployed... 
* Msg on ur mobile means there is somebody who remembers u... 
Let's be optimistic in life because everything around u happens for a reason.. 
Keep Smiling. 👍👌😄
When you Run 🏃 alone its called RACE.....

When GOD 🙏 Runs 🏃 with you its called GRACE.

**********

GROWING OLD WITH GRACE with 11 FORMULAS:

1. Live in your own place to enjoy independence and privacy.
2. Hold on to your bank deposits and assets with yourself.
3. Don't depend only on your children's promise to care for you when you grow old as their prioroties change with time.
4. Expand your circle of friends to include those who will outlive you. 
5. Do not compare and expect nothing from others.
6. Do not meddle in the life of your children. Let them live THEIR life not yours.
7. Do not use old age as your shield and justification to demand care, respect and attention.
8. Listen to what others say but think and act independently.
9. Pray, but do not beg, even from God. If at all ask for his forgiveness.
10. Last 2 IMPORTANT ONES ....
10. TAKE GOOD CARE OF OWN   HEALTH. Apart from Medical Attention, eat Best Food in the Best Way & Try to Do your own Work ...
 And finally,
 11. DO NOT RETIRE FROM LIFE.
 Well Wisher